DIVERSITY & INCLUSION RESOURCES: MICROAGGRESSIONS

Definition of "microaggression" - English Dictionary. (n.d.). Retrieved November 28, 2017, from https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/ dictionary/english/microaggression     

source

Did you really just say that? - Advice on confronting micro aggression.

Unmasking ‘racial micro aggressions’ - Understanding & language:

• Microassaults: Conscious and intentional actions or slurs, such as using racial epithets, displaying swastikas or deliberately serving a white person before a person of color in a restaurant.

• Microinsults: Verbal and nonverbal communications that subtly convey rudeness and insensitivity and demean a person's racial heritage or identity. An example is an employee who asks a colleague of color how she got her job, implying she may have landed it through an affirmative action or quota system.

• Microinvalidations: Communications that subtly exclude, negate or nullify the thoughts, feelings or experiential reality of a person of color. For instance, white people often ask Asian-Americans where they were born, conveying the message that they are perpetual foreigners in their own land.

The Microaggressions Project - A confessional blog of real comments.

Examples of Racial Microaggressions - A table of themes and messages.

How to Demonstrate Respect in the Workplace.

People First - Communicating with and about People with Disabilities.

MindTools - Communication Skills page - 19 areas of navigating difficult situations

Using Empathy Effectively

To start using empathy more effectively, consider the following:

• Put aside your viewpoint, and try to see things from the other person's point of view. When you do this, you'll realize that other people most likely aren't being evil, unkind, stubborn, or unreasonable – they're probably just reacting to the situation with the knowledge they have.
• Validate the other person's perspective. Once you "see" why others believe what they believe, acknowledge it. Remember: acknowledgement does not always equal agreement. You can accept that people have different opinions from your own, and that they may have good reason to hold those opinions.
• Examine your attitude. Are you more concerned with getting your way, winning, or being right? Or, is your priority to find a solution, build relationships, and accept others? Without an open mind and attitude, you probably won't have enough room for empathy.

Listen. Mindful Listening

1. to the entire message that the other person is trying to communicate.

• Listen with your ears – what is being said, and what tone is being used?
• Listen with your eyes – what is the person doing with his or her body while speaking?
• Listen with your instincts – do you sense that the person is not communicating something important?
• Listen with your heart – what do you think the other person feels?

2. Ask what the other person would do.

• Ask the person to explain his or her position. This is probably the simplest, and most direct, way to understand the other person. However, it's probably the least used way to develop empathy.
• It's fine if you ask what the other person wants: you don't earn any "bonus points" for figuring it out on your own.
• For example, the boss who gives her young team members turkey vouchers for the holidays, when most of them don't even cook, is using her idea of a practical gift – not theirs.
• Practice these skills when you interact with people. You'll likely appear much more caring and approachable – simply because you increase your interest in what others think, feel, and experience. It's a great gift to be willing and able to see the world from a variety of perspectives – and it's a gift that you can use all of the time, in any situation.

Here are some more tips for an empathic conversation:

• Pay attention, physically and mentally, to what's happening.
• Listen carefully, and note the key words and phrases that people use.
• Respond encouragingly to the central message.
• Be flexible – prepare to change direction as the other person's thoughts and feelings also change.
• Look for cues that you're on target.

Marshall Rosenberg’s Four Step Communication Process:

1. Observation

• “When I saw/heard  _______{observation}

2. Feeling  

• “I felt ______________ {feeling}

3. Need (not want)

• “because I have a need for _______”
• OR  “because I value ______”

4 Request (not demand)     

• “Would you be willing to ________”

List of basic feelings and needs we all share in common.